An ex consultant's blog

Xandra

2008-01-13T23:03:00.000+08:00

Today, I was at 1U sending my son for tuition when I bumped into an ex-colleague of the firm I used to work with. He used to work for me when he was a young analyst, doing some RFP consolidation work.. talented guy, had a great voice, he left the firm to do his own thing.

He saw me, and he introduced his girl friend.. Xandria. I was looking at her, Ray Bans, Bandana.. so I said.. "Xandria... Xandria Ooi ah?"

"Ya"

"Wah Lao eh (I said as I turned to my ex colleague), you sly bastard you... "

Apparently (apparently la) she just did some lasix surgery that's why she had to do the Rayban thingy (so she said when I asked if she dressed that way to avoid detection). She was quite bubbly. Not as chubby as when we see on TV, but she was covered head to toe in leotards so I couldn't check out her sexiness (haiya...). But my wife was with me so she was even more excited! ("Xandra Ooi worr....")

Who? www.xandriaooi.com

Scenes from Mumbai

2008-01-11T20:22:00.000+08:00

This is the Gateway to India. Mumbai's most famous monument, this is the starting point for most tourists who want to explore the city. It was built as a triumphal arch to commemorate the visit of King George V and Queen Mary, complete with four turrets and intricate latticework carved into the yellow basalt stone. Ironically, when the Raj ended in 1947, this colonial symbol also became a sort of epitaph: the last of the British ships that set sail for England left from the Gateway. Today this symbol of colonialism has got Indianised, drawing droves of local tourists and citizens. Behind the arch, there are steps leading down to the water. Here, you can get onto one of the bobbing little motor launches, for a short cruise through Mumbai's splendid natural harbour.

Below is Ghandi's house in Mumbai.

Some pictures on Dhoby Ghaut, which is a hand wash service out in this massive space!

Guitar Hero Air Guitar Product

2008-01-09T16:29:00.000+08:00

I want this!

check this out..

2008-01-08T23:21:00.000+08:00

Hotel Intercon

2007-12-21T13:03:00.000+08:00

I'm down in Singapore now. Decided to take a break and do my annual pilgrimage down south to help the economy there.

When I arrived at Hotel Intercon, the receptionist told me that her "guest relations officer" (mmm) will escort me up to my room. There she came, a cute one, perky t*ts, super short mini skirt. The only tak steam thing was my wife and son was with me. Alah..... lemah... So there I was, with my son bouncing up and down the hallway, making it hard for me to concentrate on her butt...

But I digress. The hotel was nice. But then I saw this super cheem 2 bottles of water, each only 250 mls in the room.. Pellegrino. I'm like.. wah lao.. why so branded one?

I called the guest relations chick and I asked her "eh.. these 2 bottles.. why not just give me spritzer.. my previous trips you guys always gave me the Singapore branded bottles.. it was like 500 mls each, and 3 bottles each day.."

The girl said "those 2 bottles are welcome gift. Nowadays, no more complimentary bottles each day"

Basket! Damn kedekut!

Astro sux

2007-12-20T15:20:00.000+08:00

These few days, I'm damn fed up with Astro. For those not living in Malaysia, Astro is a satellite television broadcast service that has a receiver box with the tagline "Digital Multimedia Terminal". Now that is just one big freaking lie. Why? Despite all the so-called digital broadcast, Astro’s picture truly sucks big time. They are so shitty that Sony has to come up with an Astro Enhancement Mode for its Bravia line of LCD TVs. In fact, most stores refuse to use Astro when doing demos with TVs because if they did it would be the equivalent of watching your privates under a microscope. Lemah looking colour, grainy picture, slow frame per second, and sometimes pixelated picture makes me wonder if I’m watching our nation's premier cable station or a ciplak VCD. Try comparing terrestrial channels (TV1, TV2, TV3, NTV7) using normal VHF/UHF antenna to the TV1, 2, and 3 from Astro.

What's worst is recently I bought a brand spanking (tv lah) new 42 inch (i'm still talking abt the TV) LCD tv. True HD with 1960 pixel thingamajig and all those bells and whistles.

But Kanina.. my testicles nearly exploded when I hooked it up to Astro.. I'm like, WTF.. why is the picture quality like cock? Then I did some investigation and found out all these lies Astro says abt it being a "Digital Multimedia Terminal" (DMT) ... digital my ass.. Astro gives out an analogue signal.

I went to the DMT, turned it around, and worst still, it only supports S Cable. Not even the Blue, Green, Red Component cables... teruk...

Talking abt Component Cables, I originally hooked up my old PS2 to my LCD and again I thought the pictures were like crap. I realised that the PS2 gives out 576 resolution, and my TV terlalu sensitive so it picks up all imperfections. I recently I bought some component cables which seperated the blue, green and red signals to seperate cables and wah lan, I can now play Fifa 2008 and when Javier Mascherano sliding tackles Christiano Ronaldo, I can see Ronaldo really whining his head off so clearly. Sweet.

Simply Hantam video from 2005

2007-12-01T23:57:00.001+08:00

Finally, I got around to posting this video of Simply Hantam playing at the 2005 BUM. It's only 30 seconds.. thank god!

Country Bumkin

2007-11-24T23:20:00.000+08:00

I've been staying at my new place for 3 days already... and I can tell you the feeling is like Katak di bawah tempurung. Sudah lah, I'm a Malacca boy.. from small town.. previously staying in a modest housing area, now moving into an upmarket and yuppie area.. and I'm still not used to living here!

I still walk around shirtless. I still dress shambolically (if I do dress up) at home. I still throw my rubbish in re-used Jaya Jusco or Tesco plastic bags (instead of paying for proper garbage bags).... ya la.. my wife said.. how la, people look at us they cannot believe we're staying in such a place! :)

Moved In!

2007-11-24T00:06:00.000+08:00

Here are some pictures of my new house!

My New House

2007-11-20T01:37:00.000+08:00

Some of you have been bugging me to put up pictures of my new place. I haven't really taken much, but here's how the house was "being built" from many months ago..

This was one of my early shots of the house

Progressive build...

Here's after I gained possession, and me building a pond in the garden...

House for Sale!

2007-11-20T01:31:00.000+08:00

In a day's time, I will be shifting house. I'm taking the opportunity to put up my house in Bukit Rahman Putra for sale. Here's a picture. Lemme know in the comments whether you're interested. Partially furnished. 20 X 70. 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms.

Kazahstan Idol

2007-10-19T07:17:00.000+08:00

Last few days I was in a KL hotel attending an Asia wide conference..and in a bid to spice up my presentation, I spent a few hours thrawling thru you tube to find funny videos.

I found this one...

And apparently after that dude did that on the show, it became a hit! Look at this!

Sorry

2007-10-16T17:43:00.000+08:00

It's been a while since I blogged.. and I have been getting many emails reprimanding me on why the sudden slowdown.. aiyo... normal la... busy.. but then again, that's not a good excuse...

Another reason why I have been holding back writing is because I guess the circle of folks reading this blog has indeed increased beyond my expectations. When I started writing this, I was quite a fed up consultant in a large consulting organisation (let's call it A).. so most of the folks reading my blog were folks from A.

Then when I moved, I went and joined organisation X. (haha.. you guys thought I would say "M", ya? Am I that predictable?). So then my circle of readers were both A and X.

Sometimes, when blogging, I may have said things that may have pissed off A, sometimes, X.. but more often than not, I have been careful of pissing off X, because they indeed pay my salary :)

And if you remember, there was a partner from A that invited me for talks to explore whether it made sense coming back to A. Honestly, I have restrained blogging that episode.. because I didn't want to send warning signals out to X.

But what the heck.. this is where I am. I think the thought of coming back has always been interesting. And I'll be quite honest, I do miss the work in A. Yeah yeah.. I bitched a lot abt the work, abt how clients treated us like crap.. but honestly, the work is interesting.

Where I am in X, yeah.. the work is interesting, but somehow, in my position doing a lot of virtual work, I find that at times, I need the face to face contact with clients, the thrill and excitement of pitting brains in a one on one discussion, the tense situation pitching something you know may not work in front of a client... haha... yeah.. I'm a sucker for pain..

So this thought has been lingering around for a while. And I think the partners in A sense this.. so they have been reaching out to me. Yeah.. I have had discussions.. serious discussions? So far, I think, things can only be described as "exploratory". I don't see it happening, honestly.

On one hand, I always thought the salary would be a stumbling block.. yeah.. I do enjoy a nice package in X, but I guess, I'm at a stage where a good career is probably something that needs more attention.

So, away with the salary.. what's the current issue? I think for me to come back, it needs to be a win win. When I left A, I felt that the firm marginalised kick ass executors like me. I still remember, project after project, bailing the firm out.. but when it comes to promotions, it's the guys who wine and dine the clients that get promoted.

And it's the same in X. Same thing.. so many projects have I executed, in fact, more in parallel compared with A, but it's the guys who just talk and talk that get all the glory. It's frustrating. I'm sometimes the brains behind a lot of ideas, but I have been in situations where my ideas get packaged into a nice ppt but somehow I don't ever get the recognition..

Anyway.. so back to the saga of "coming back to A". Like I said, it needs to be win win. Apparently the firm has now changed. I was told that they now value people like me who "execute". That's where the impasse is now... for me, the win win is for me to come back, I think it makes sense for me to come back at a certain level. I was a bit disappointed when I was told that even the firm A values executors, but to come back at a certain level, I would need to have demonstrated the art of selling. So what? Come back at the previous level where I left. Take a bet on selling a big project.. so this is where things are.. the art of selling.. does it make sense? And even if I did demonstrate it, all I want to do is to come back at a certain level, and just kick ass in projects. I don't really want to do any selling. I'm the best there is at what I do. And what I do isn't very nice (yeah.. I stole that line from a Wolverine comic - so sue me). This is why it looks unlikely of happening.

Does this all make sense? If it doesn't, it must be because of many weeks of not blogging. And I promise this won't happen too often any more :)

Malacca Food Guide

2007-10-13T04:11:00.000+08:00

I am bringing this old post to the top as I have some visitors from Mexico!

I have been asked many times "where to eat cendol, where to eat satay celup, where's the best chicken rice ball" in Malacca that I have decided to put this guide up.

Firstly, when you're in Malacca, lets start with the Stadhuys as a landmark. This is a historical site that the Dutch left behind and besically it is a set of red buildings.

Immediately opposite the Stadhuys fountain, there is a cendol stall set in a mangosteen like structure. That fella has been there for years man! Good old traditional cendol. If you want more keng chow cendol with thick slabs of durian paste, you have to maken your way to Tan Kim Hock instead. Ask around. There's one Tan Kim Hock in Jalan Bendahara. You cannot miss it.

Now once you're at the Stadhuys or at the cendol stall, just up ahead is the Malacca River and there's a small bridge going across the river. Go across this river. You can see OCBC bank on your left, and a coffee shop on your right.

That coffee shop has the best chicken rice ball in Malacca. Don't get fooled with all thesae Famosa Chicken Rice stalls.. these are the very commercialised chains sprouting around. That corner shop is the best. Very hard to get a place to sit! Each sitting, whack lah 8-10 balls!

Now, after eating your chicken rice ball, it's time to head towards Jalan Bunga Raya. Head down that street that you turned into for the Chicken rice ball, and head a few metres until the end. Turn right.

After you turn right, you'll hit another small bridge. Go up and down. A few metres later, there's a fork in the road. Head left into Jalan Bunga Raya.

Now in this Jalan Bunga Raya, after you turn in, near the middle of the stretch of the road, on the right hand side, is a little lane shown below. This lane is well known for 2 things. In the afternoon, there are a few char siew farn shops there. Any one is good :)

Then at night, there is a guy frying wok chien there. This guy is the original guy's son. The original fella, he fry until his head oso senget man!

Now, I'm gonna take you to a different side of town. This is near the neighbourhood that I grew up. Ujong Pasir!

Start at the Hotel Equatorial very near the Stadhuys. Ask Around. It's very easy to get to.

From the Equatorial, head towards Ujong Pasir.

Now, as you make your way on Jalan Ujong Pasir, there are 3 great food shops all beside each other on the left.

First up is the Newton Food Place. This has a variety of food items. You name it, it has it. Satay Chelup, Satay, BBQ chicken wings, noodles.. everything lah! The satay chelup there is great!

Next to it is OUB. Not the bank, but another food court. Like Newton, this has a variety of items too. Notable try outs here are
- the hey keow
- the ee pheng (this is the prawn or fish balls and fritters). The guy here is exceptional. Must eat early! By 8pm the fella habis oready!
- the mee siam! mm mmm
- the fried Indo Mie

Lastly, next to OUB is this place called Perakanan Place. Newly renovated, this has the best nonya laksa down south. Previously, this place looked like the dumps - delapilated building etc.. but still the laksa was the best. You can also buy nonya kueh there. Great stuff. Also, there is thong sui like ang tau chui. All sorts of great food in these 3 places!

Now that we have finished at these 3 places, wanna have some nyonya food? Ponteh Chicken? Ikan Masak Asam? Top Hats? Lemme show you the inner depths of Ujong Pasir!

Head straight down the road after OUB.. there's a fork on the road, turn left into Jalan Bukit Senjuang.

Now head down Jalan Bukit Senjuang and keep your eyes peeled to the right. There's a small lane BEFORE the traffic lights. That lane is Lorong Bukit Senjuang. Turn right into that lane.

When you're on Lorong Bukit Senjuang, follow that winding road, then turn left at the end. You are now back at Jalan Ujong Pasir

Drive along Jalan Ujong Pasir till almost reaching Jalan Padang Temu. On your left is a row of shophouses and first up is Aunty Lee's - a nice baba nonya restaurant.

Opposite Aunty Lee's, you can see diagonally a lane where busses go in (sometimes the Malacca Town Bus Service goes in there). In the mornings, there's a guy with a cleft lip frying kick ass chai tau kueh there. Best chai tau kueh down south and some say KL!

After eating all that nonya food and chai tau kueh, lets try something different.

Head in the opposite direction on Jalan Ujong Pasir. Go straight right till the end, and you will see a fork on the road. Turn left into Jalan Melaka Raya

After turning left into Jalan Melaka Raya, keep right. There's another fork on the road. Turn right.

Once you are on this road, head straight for say abt 600ms, keep your eyes peeled to the right. You will see this Yong Peng Fish Ball shop. This guy makes his own fish ball and it's like the Chow Sing Chee movie: God of Kitchen with the pissing beef ball. Once you bite into this fish ball, it explodes out port pieces inside! Steam! The laksa there is also good.

Now for my last cool Malacca food item, let me take you to find pineapple tarts! This is a little tricky.

Start at the Stadhuys. Go up that little bridge crossing Malacca River with the Chicken Rice Ball shop on the right. This time, turn left.

Follow the road until you see Jalan Hang Lekir on your right. Turn into that road.

It's a short road that will bring you to the main Jonker Walk Road. Now Jalan Hang Lekir is like Hong Kong's Lan Kwai Fong or Bangsar with a lot of pubs at nite. At the end of Jalan Hang Lekir, with the Geographer's cafe at your right, turn right.

Go on this main road and quickly turn left on Jalan Hang Lekiu. Then immediately left again. Go straight and you will go past the famous Cheng Hoon Teng temple.

A few metres away from the temple, on the left, is a home made pineapple tarts shop. It's great!

Funny ad

2007-09-16T23:20:00.000+08:00

On my many trips to korea, I came across this advert that I thought was just so suggestively funny!

The things I deal with

2007-08-23T19:00:00.000+08:00

I'm showing u guys a sample workplan from a TOP Notch Big ONE consulting company.. but these are the Mexicans.. this is what I have to deal with man!

Did u notice it?

Redundancy

2007-08-20T15:02:00.000+08:00

Last week, I was in Korea doing some reviews. This week, on the way back, I had to stop bye Hong Kong.

I had a mission. And its a mission of its worst kind. I had to make redundant one of the guys working for me.

Now with close to 15 years of working experience, I have never had to tell anyone that his or her job is no longer in existence so you must imagine that it was a traumatic experience for myself too.

This guy who I had to terminate, sigh.. long story la.. I actually am ok with this fella, but this fella somehow just rubbed the Asia CIO the wrong way. Yes, given, this guy is a Hongkie, and given that sometimes the way Hongkie's say things in a sarcastic manner, when this guy first started working on my project, he used to piss ppl off quite big time with his mannerisms. I really had to work on this fella, but somehow the Asia CIO felt that this guy is not "value for money".

So to cut a long story short, I had to go into the HK office, bring this fella into the room with HR and tell him the bad news.

And before doing that, I had to read the dummies guide of how to make someone redundant, what to say, what not to say etc etc.

So with my most professional voice, I had to say the memorized script of "After an operational review of the current projects in the region, it is a business decision that your role has been made redundant". Jialat.

And this guy didn't take it likely man. The guidelines say "plan for 30 minutes". The entire affair took more than 3 hours!

First, this guy insisted that he wanted to talk to the CIO of all CIOs. Then I arranged for a call with this Asia CIO instead. And all this time, we have been trying to get him to review his redundant package (which I must say is A LOT OF MOOLAH!) but he kept saying
"I won't sign"
"This is wrong"
"You can run thru the package but I won't listen"
"You can post this letter to my home address"

Wah.. all these reactions, the dummies guide never prepared me for it.

In the end, after 3 hours of ding dongining, he stood up and said "I'm taking sick leave".

Now the even trickier bit is that today is actually his last day. So we had to make it clear to him.

And this guy refused to leave his laptop behind. "You can call the police if you want my laptop". Sigh.. I didn't have the heart to wrestle his laptop away from him.

I feel very shitty today. So I did what any woman would do - I went shopping. G2000 had a sale!

But seriously, I felt crap. Never had to do this before. Felt that the company could have handed things better like creating a place for him to go, but I guess somehow the Asia CIO is so pissed that there was really no more avenues for this guy.

I hope that one day if I am in a position of power, I will always strive to create positions for one to go to...

Hasselhoff

2007-08-10T00:23:00.000+08:00

No.. Hasselblad. Was talking to my brother just today and he said he angan angan nak beli camera baru. So I ask, which one. He said this

http://procamera.com.my/store/HasselbladH3D.html

Aiyo..check the prices out! RM72,434.70 On Sales! I nearly heart attack man!

Faceful

2007-08-03T22:57:00.001+08:00

I was in a shopping mall recently and I got a faceful of this! Hahaha.. my son was laughing when I snapped this going up the staircase. Are we allowed to advertise indiscrimately?

By the way, I spotted Optimus Prime in Toys R Us recently...

Bad luck

2007-07-31T22:36:00.001+08:00

Today I was in 1 Utama paying off my last payment to Signature Kitchen..hmm.. this signature kitchen, I also have something to say.. .. anyway, 1U, in conjunction with Mega Shopping Carnival, have this special deal where you spend RM100 and you get this scratch card. Match 2 out of the 5 scratches and you can claim a prize.

Wah lao.. this woman in front of me, she tikam her card and scratch, she won a Sony Handy Cam!

My spirits were high. I got my card. I scratched.. match! Then I checked the prize.. Mystery Gift! I tore open the envelope.. Kaninah.. Clarins RM30 facial voucher. Basket!

Comix!

2007-07-31T22:21:00.000+08:00

Suddenly, I'm on a roll blogging about my comics. A lot of you ask why? Well, I remember when I used to start collecting comics. I got introduced when I was still studying in Malacca High School during the 80s. Then, there were no speciality shops. Cover price of one comic is abt RM1.80 (compared to RM12.80 or more today!)

The comics came only once a week or fortnight. They came to this Indian mamak shop selling newspapers which was abt 2km away from my school. So after school, there's a few of us hard core comic collectors, the moment the school bell rang, we start walking like the Olympics man... cause the issues that came very limited.. like X-Men.. if u lucky, maybe one or 2 issues. New Mutants.. maybe 2 or 3 issues. That scarce! So after school, it was a race lah! Those were the good old days where we had Uncanny X-men 193 (Heroes for Hope - the Ethiopia special), X-Men vs Alpha Flight 1 and 2, The Thor Saga where he became a frog, Alpha Flight during good old John Bryne days .. ah....

So why do I still collect comics?

The women lah!

HAHAHAHA

no la.. actually I'm not so perverted.. but I must say that nowadays, the comics art is getting better.. check some of these out

Cencorship

2007-07-30T17:52:00.000+08:00

Now that I've started a post on comics, I'm on a roll.

Last weekend I went over to my favourite Mind Shop in CentrePoint. X-Men issue 200 was out. I was reviewing the cover online and I could not wait to get my hands on it. This was the cover:

But when I got it, the lady gave me this!

So I was like, wah lao eh.. why kena this cover leh, Ah Soh (the lady at the counter is this old lady who has been at the shop for more than 15 years... yes.. she is that old).

The Ah Soh said "ah.. this one variant cover. The nice cover, must pay RM4 more".

I'm like KNNECCB. How come kena RM4 more?

So the lady said "ah, actually the cover price same one, but nowadays, when the cover got sexy leng loi, we order from different source to circumvent customs. Last time, when got sexy leng loi on the cover, the cencorship now will confiscate la, blacken lah etc etc".

I'm like.. where got sexy leng loi one... then the Ah Soh points me out to Phoenix on the cover (she's near Wolverine). I'm like.. wah lao eh.. that one also can kena sai ah?

Ya lor, the Ah Soh says. She says that nowadays, the cencorship board got lady officers from Kelantan one.. so sure kena sai one.. I'm like.. wah, if so mild also kena, what if there was Power Girl? Sure kena one, says Ah Soh. Then I pointed to another cover

This one we also kena, last week! Ayo!

Power Girl

2007-07-29T15:22:00.001+08:00

You know, I've been collecting comics for quite a while. I must say that sometimes, the women drawn in comics are a little out of proportion.. Jim Lee has been doing quite a good job.. long legs till the nostrils, tantric breasts..

Talking about breasts, one great mysteries of the comic world is Power Girl's Breasts.

Don't know what I'm talking about. Here you go.

Now, Power Girl first appeared on the scene in All-Star Comics #58 in January of 1976, continuing where the old All-Star Comics left off, with #57, back in 1951. This continuation of the original All-Star Comics brought back the popular JSA members that appeared often in the Justice League title into their own book, as well as introducing new members like Power Girl, Star-Spangled Kid, and Robin from Earth-2. Here, we see Power Girl’s breasts are quite large, bigger than most super heroines of the time. Was this by accident, or did creators Gerry Conway and Ric Estrada purposely create the world’s first super hero whose entire history would be overshadowed by her…physical attributes? I think this one is lost to the sands of time.

As Power Girl continued to appear in various Justice League and All-Star Squadron comics, more and more people began to comment on her breasts. By the time Crisis on Infinite Earths was over and Karen Starr was a member of the Justice League again, they became one of the time’s longest running in-jokes, next to “Bwa-hah-hah” and the pies-in-the-face from Suicide Squad.

Power Girl now appears in the new Justice Society of America. She's tough as Superman. But I think the attention is elsewhere. Not convinced? Here's more evidence.

Time to move?

2007-07-23T15:30:00.000+08:00

Last week I was in town picking up my will. Ya.. you know la, ever since my dad passed away without a will, I saw how tough it was without a will so I quickly had one drafted out.

Anyway, when I was in town, I was contacted by my old firm's Head of Malaysia and he wanted to have a chat with me in terms of how I was getting along etc etc. To cut a long story short, we discussed pros and cons of where I was, whether I was happy and what my next move was. Of course, I told him that job satisfaction was very high when I used to work in my old firm, the only issue being the ability to be promoted.. that was when this Head of Malaysia proceeded to explain that the firm is no longer the way it was, no longer is sales seen to be the only reason for promoting someone...

Of course la.. u guys may know, I left my old firm purely due to the fact that I found it tough that someone with my execution skills got bypassed.. the firm was still a good place to grow, to learn etc etc. Yes, I'm sentimental, so sue me.

But I told this person I spoke to that I have 2 issues now, if at the end of the day he wanted me back in the firm
1. I am now a prostitute. I am quite happy with my compensation
2. What would I come back as.

I was told that it would be difficult to bring me back as an SE (well whoopee doo). Boo :(

To question 1, I was told that nowadays, SMs (that's what I left as) can even make more...

So I told him that bottom line, I would be coming back to restart my career at the exact same point where I left... not very exciting eh?

Hong Kong "Bus Uncle"

2007-07-16T06:54:00.000+08:00

I spent the last few days back in Hong Kong. We had a system that was being decomissioned.

This was when I found out about this Bus Uncle phenomena.

In late April 2006 a young bus commuter named Elvis Ho Yui Hei got annoyed when the man in front of him was speaking too loudly on his cell phone. He asked the man politely (addressing the older man as “uncle” which is a sign of respect for older people) to speak more softly and the “Uncle” proceeded to lean over his seat and rip poor Elvis a new one.

A man across the aisle named Jon Fong Wing Hang recorded the whole thing with his cell phone and uploaded in onto the net, and now the clip is spreading like wildfire. Uncle Bus as he is known kept shouting about how the matter was “Not yet resolved! Not yet resolved! Not yet resolved! …I face pressure. You face pressure. Why do you provoke me?” and those phrases are now the “in” lingo in Hong Kong. Ask someone to do something and if they decline with an “I face pressure” response, and you have been Uncled-bussed.

Uncle Bus himself was actually not known until reporters began combing the bus route in hopes of spotting him. He was later located and lives in a tiny 360 square foot apartment with 5 cats and identified as 51 year old Roger Chan.

When you watch it, you know what I mean.. creapy...

Beijing

2007-07-06T21:03:00.000+08:00

YA! I am in Beijing today!

Wah lao.. this whole week busy like shit man.. I was in this workshop speaking 3 languages man.. English, Mandarin and Cantonese.. because we have a vendor from HK... and most of the users are Mandarin speakers.. so .. my Mandarin so koyak one.. what to do..

Anyway, I didn't get a chance to do much.. only today the workshop finished early, I managed to sneak out to take some pictures at Tianamen Square and outside the forbidden city (outside only.. cannot go in.. I arrived there too late) ..because I had to stay back and solve production issues.. sigh..

And this picture below is the famous stall in Wang Fu Jing selling friend scorpions!

Elvis spotted in Jaya Jusco

2007-07-02T19:35:00.000+08:00

The above was spotted in Jaya Jusco on Sunday! A bit blur.. had to use my mobile phone to take it from far!

TmNet

2007-06-18T22:41:00.000+08:00

I was in Malacca over the weekend and I wanted to cancel my dad's internet account.. I have my own, my bro has his own etc...

So I call TM Net and I tell them that my dad is no longer here and I need to cancel...

"procedure-nya senang, you suruh bapa you datang ke TmPoint dan bawa IC"

"eh, baru saya cakap dia dah meninggal, amacam dia nak datang ke TmPoint?"

DOH

Catching up...

2007-06-18T21:10:00.000+08:00

It's been a week since I blogged.. been catching up with things...

Firstly, my son's new school timing is quite tough on me.. I need to wake up at 530am to leave the house by 7am to reach his school by 730am. Imagine.. if I had calls ending at 2am? Koyak.

I've also been trying to adjust with life without my dad. Ok.. so my dad doesn't live with me.. but he used to live with my mom in Malacca and he was quite a handy man so my mom feels very lost without him. How to turn on the Astro ah? Aiyo.. the tap burst, how ah? Aiyo, how to pay the water bill ah? Mundane things that freak my mom out. Yes, I've been coaxing her to come up to KL but she's very sentimental with Malacca.. it takes time...

My dad also passed away without a will. My dad was an ultimate pantang person. Don't talk abt death to him. He will karate chop you! So any discussions about will or planning used to be greeted with stares of icy chilling cold. Seram!

When my dad passed, my bro and I had a couple of days window to faster scrummage thru his things, get his bank books, ATM cards and we had to decipher what PIN nos he used etc etc... all before his orbiturary came out... luckily we managed to get most out.. but the motorbike (very old Honda C70), car (very old Mitsubishi Galant) and house all is under his name. That's the next big headache.. how do we get the grant transferred over to my mom.

So last weekend, I came back to Malacca to be with my mom. The house felt empty. But my mom tells me that her neighbour a few nights ago spotted someone with a cap on a bicycle in front of our house in the wee hours of the morning! For those of you who know my dad, that sounded really like him! I am glad my dad is back and happily pursuing is favourite pastime of cycling around...

Back to School

2007-06-11T23:54:00.000+08:00

I am back in KL and today my son started his new journey in a new school. In this, it calls for some changes for me too.

In the past, my son was in the afternoon school. This time, his school is in the morning.. so my son had to wrestle with waking up at 545am to be at his school by 730am. This is also a struggle for me as I also tend to work late with calls till late. Imagine that.. if my last call ends at 2am, i have hardly enuff sleep before having to wake up at 530am to prepare my son for school.

Indeed a challenge! The first day wasn't too bad.. but lets see how long I can tahan!

Thanks to all

2007-06-10T15:12:00.000+08:00

I would like to take a few moments to thank those of you who made the trip to Malacca to pay respect to my father. It was a simple gesture, yet it meant a lot to me. Thank You

Cremation

2007-06-08T07:55:00.000+08:00

My father's cremation will be today, 8th June, leaving the parlour oppossite Seck Kia Eenh at 11am. Just a short note for those of you following these last few week's blogs.

Receiving my father

2007-06-06T21:41:00.000+08:00

My father came back to Malaysia today. His plane arrived around 240pm and by the time we got him out of the cargo it was already almost 6pm. It is now 945pm. He is now on his way back from Sungai Besi, to arrive at the parlour around 1045pm - 11pm. His wake will be tomorrow, with his final sending off on Friday.

The parlour is at 46 Jalan Gajah Berang, for those of you who know my father, accounting teacher of St. Francis Institution, camera enthusiast, travel addict and a father and husband.

Values

2007-06-05T23:48:00.000+08:00

Today was an emotional day for me. As my dad arrives tomorrow, I find myself packing clothes for my dad in order to dress him up for his "sending away".

My mom was literally in tears when she was packing his things.. She kept saying "ah, I want to give him some pants.. you see, this one is new, but this one is his favourite.. you see lah, his favourite one koyak koyak, the garter also loose oready still he wears"... and "I want to give your dad some nice shirts, this one is new, but you see lah, this one his favourite, from 1970s.. still he keeps wearing..."

My dad was a normal school teacher. His salary, at peak, probably never hit more than RM2,500 and yet miraculously he managed to send me and my brother over to Australia. Granted, we both had scholarships, but the fact is he managed to put us thru university with what was was scant salary.

My mom used to tell me about how my dad, after coming home from school, would rest for an hour before he took his trusty Honda C70 and road out and gave Accounting Tuition. It was that kind of dedication that put me and my brother thru university.

Dad, I want to say Thank You for all that you've done for me...

Parlour Address

2007-06-05T17:31:00.000+08:00

For those of you interested, my father's wake will be at
46 Jalan Gajah Berang
75200 Melaka

Coming Home

2007-06-05T01:29:00.000+08:00

My dad is finally coming home.

In a few hours, he will be on a plane to Amsterdam, then enroute to KL. He will arrive in KL in the afternoon of Wednesday June 6. We were originally thinking of rushing him home to Malacca but we were advised that because of the length of time spent on the plane, and because MAS CARGO did not have a place to "inspect the nature of the goods", the best is to move my dad to KL first, inspect him, touch up if necessary before returning to Malacca.

By the time my dad arrives in Malacca, we're probably shooting for 10-11pm on Wednesday. The wake will be opposite of the Seck Kia Eenh Buddhist temple, with this temple being very popular in Malacca located in the Gajah Berang area.

http://wikimapia.org/2006768/

Funeral will likely be on Friday June the 8th.

I guess after all this, the postings here will be less morbid...

CSI

2007-06-05T01:23:00.000+08:00

The last few days have been tough on my brother and I. Both of us were busy rummaging thru all of my father's old materials, papers, slips of thingybobs just to try and reconstruct whatever bits and pieces of information regarding his financials.. like
- what credit cards does he have
- what savings does he havfe
- what stocks does he have
- what bills does he have

Then we had to trace and figure out whether he had any auto debits with any credit cards.. switch them over to me or my brother's cards..

Worst was my father's sole accounts.. my father passed without a will (or if he had one, I could not find it...) and therefore the law is that the government would freeze your accounts.. so we were scrambling to find where he stored his ATM cards..

We found a safe deposit key, then we had to figure out which bank he kept it at.. and when we finally traced the right bank, we found after we opened the safe deposit box.. there was another box with another key! Ayo... damn susah man...

Anyway, we managed to reconcile many things (this is where I am glad I am a master of reconciliation... you guys who have seen me in action during conversion will know..) but there were still a few ATM cards with no PIN numbers.. There was one card with a PIN, but the ATM immediately swallowed it.. so.. very tough...

Lesson learnt.. leave a will...

Discoveries

2007-06-04T02:41:00.000+08:00

As I go thru my father's things.. i discover a few interesting things about my dad.

My brother bought my dad a Palm Zire 71 a few years ago because my dad was always the curious one who wanted to try things out. But when I accessed my dad's Zire, there was hardly any worthwile notes in there. Instead, I discover my dad had a passion of cutting up old envelops into small 2 inch by 2 inch squares which he brings around in his pouch and this is where he jots down things!

I saw an envelope full of those cuttings and that just moved me...

Then I also found out that my dad was also quite crafty. There was one of those envelopes where he wrote down a sequence of 5 songs. Knowing my dad, those were not his song choices. So I asked around and I found out that my dad recently won more than RM5K on Light and Easy's "Guess that sound"! Apparently my dad had a friend whose son worked in Astro and that boy would wait till the cash prize snowballed teruk teruk then the boy would leak the answer to his dad. So his dad would then pakat with my dad to call into the radio station!

Crafty!

I think that bit I inherited from my dad :)

Needle in a haystack

2007-06-03T10:24:00.000+08:00

When my dad passed away, I now understand how important it is to have a very meticulous filing system. Yesterday, I spent a few hours pouring over his items trying to find traces of his ATM cards, his insurance, everything.. it was like looking for a needle in a haystack... sometimes it felt like an episode of CSI.. cause we find a piece of paper with a 6 digit number and immediately we think "could this be the PIN number to this ATM card?".... I'm still going thru..

Repatriation

2007-06-02T08:31:00.000+08:00

I went thru a lot just to get my father's remains repatriated home. Yesterday, I spent almost the whole day at the bank trying to find better ways to remit funds over to the funeral house that held my dad's remains in Venice.

Being non Asian, they insisted that all payment be received before they repatriated the body. Then I find out that a Telegraph Transfer takes 2-3 days! SO I scrambled to see what other options there were.

I checked out Western Union. Wow.. this was some kinda chettiah like fund transfer. Maximum USD2,500. But you cannot transfer to a bank account. You transfer to a person. And in the form, you actually have to decribe the guy's physical appearance. Cheem!

I explored topping up my brother's credit card (he's there with my mom) and asking my bro to withdraw. But even tho I put in enuff funds, any withdrawal will incur cash advance charges..

So it was down to Telegraph Transfer, then I find out that the undertaker had not furnished certain details.. so again it was another scramble.

Thank god for technology, just before the bank closed at 4pm, Venice woke up, and the undertaker (not the WWF guy) found me online on google talk! Thank god for the blackberry too!

So in the end, online, with me using the blackberry (this is not an advertisement), the undertaker decided on good faith to repatriate my father's remains. He arrives on Wed next week and the wake will be in Malacca...

Complications

2007-06-01T00:35:00.000+08:00

My father, whom I missed, passed away whilst on holiday. The complications are immense... I normally don't blog such morbid stuff but I cannot bring myself to blog about nice things and happy thoughts.

When a person passes away in a foreign land, one needs to make a decision whether to repatriate the body back, or to cremate and bring the ashes back. That was one decision point I had to go thru.

Repatriating the body back is also another headache. It is not cheap. For my dad, it will cost me close to 5K Euro. I need to start moonlighting at Jalan Chow Kit to make up for the expenditures.

And if you thought that having tons of cash expedited matters, you are wrong. You need all manners of certificates from the foreign land like death certificates, burial cert, enbalming cert, doctor reports, police reports etc etc.. all things that will drive you crazy.

Already I am multi tasking between work and planning for my father's "trip back home". Getting the approvals is another headache. My father passed away on Tuesday morning. It is now Thursday night. I don't know when my father will be sent back.

As I write this, I feel an immense heaviness in the heart, an immense heaviness in the eyes. Yes, I can simply blame work.. (which I still have to do, if not I cannot pay the bills.. for all of you who still think I am paid a lot, I keep telling you I am not. Please believe me). I owe it to my father, who has thought me the virtues of working hard.. I remember the times when I finished my SPM. Straight away he threw me this book and forced me to learn typing. That's why a lot of you wonder how come I can type so well. It is my father's guidance.

Yes, there are a lot of things attributed to my father. He had a bald patch.. my school friends used to say that Phil Collins was my dad. I am also balding.

My father has a very strong silent characteristic who will support his students during exams and during his teaching days. I guess some of that also rubbed off on me.

I pray that the red tape gets cleared soon so that my father will be back home soon.

3 calls

2007-05-30T21:22:00.000+08:00

Just before my trip to Hong Kong, my dad called me up. My dad normally doesn't do so. He said "Hey karipap, me and mom are going on a trip to Italy this Friday, so, try to call back ..."

I sometimes am so busy that I tend to neglect my pious duties of calling to check on my parents.

I did as my father advised. Spoke to my mom. My dad was happy.

The day of my parents' trip, my dad calls me from the airport. He says "we're here at KLIA. Our flight is just after midnight, wish us the best". My dad called at 830pm. Doh, I thought. But I did as my father told me.

At the same time when my parents went to Italy, I went over to Hong Kong to resolve some operational issues. On Tuesday afternoon, I get a call from my brother. He said "Something happened to dad. He has passed away".

3 calls that changed my life... dad.. I miss you...

Clothes

2007-05-29T08:16:00.001+08:00

Some ex colleague found out I was in HK and asked of a certain clothing shop was on sale...

ex_colleague: boss
ex_colleague: are the sales on now?
karipap: ya
karipap: err..
ex_colleague: in HK?
karipap: dono la
ex_colleague: aiya
karipap: i haven't gone into the city
ex_colleague: ask your wife la
karipap: tomorrow la
ex_colleague:
karipap: i tell u
ex_colleague: let me know pls?
karipap: can!
ex_colleague: esp if mastina is on sale
ex_colleague:
karipap: Mastina?
karipap: what's that?
ex_colleague: clothes shop
karipap: where?
ex_colleague: anyway
ex_colleague: they are everywhere
ex_colleague: it's like g2k
karipap: haven't heard of them
karipap: maybe i have not paid attention
karipap: Unless they are revealing type clothes like XIXILI.. then i won't notice
ex_colleague: hehehe
ex_colleague: hahahaha
ex_colleague: office clothes
karipap: aiya...
karipap: then i won't notice la

www.xixili.com.my (Pity its under construction)

Hong Kong

2007-05-28T23:24:00.000+08:00

I'm back in Hong Kong.. supposed to lepak with family.. it's the school holiday.. but kanina.. end up working..

I was in Disneyland, wah lan.. while jalan in the river cruise also got conference call. Then at night kena review functional gaps.. jialat man. When will this end!

Mobile Phone!

2007-05-25T01:28:00.001+08:00

Nowadays, kids as young as Standard 3 are already using handphones. I was recently at my son's sports day and I saw all the tiny children all SMSing away at the side of the padang!

Anyway, the thought did come across my mind.. do I need one for my son.. he's only in Standard 2!

That thought first came when one day, I was caught in a jam, and I could not reach his school in time to pick him up. The poor fella was quite worried so much so I did think that that's when a mobile phone would come in handy...

Anyway, I didn't get it then.. but a few days ago, my son's Chinese tuition teacher suggested that one way of encouraging my son to improve on his Chinese vocabulary is to use a phone's Hanyu Pinyin SMS capabilities. Apparently, she's been using this approach with a lot of her kids and they all are hooked. And of course la, my son also is hooked... the teacher sets them targets of say 1 SMS in Chinese a day...

So today I went over to the shops and got my son a basic Sony Ericsson J100i. RM 180. I cannot imagine I got suckered into this...

Retirement

2007-05-22T09:32:00.000+08:00

I was attending a very senior partner's retirement yesterday. This partner was someone who I worked for for many years when I was in my previous company.

You know, I left my old company in 2005 because I felt there was no way for me to progress further in the firm. Sometimes, I look back and regret that action. Yes, I have more pay right now, but sometimes it is the camaraderie and the "family closeness" of my first company that brings very nostalgic feelings, somethings that are not apparent in the place I'm working for right now. Honestly, right now, I am just a prostitute, working for the person who pays me the highest. I'm nothing more than a hired mercernary.

This senior partner, I remember joining the firm and I was warned not to piss this fella off. "wah, yesterday I heard he tore up an Analysts' resume man and told him to get out". Already I kecut when I heard that.

But this partner has somehow treated me well. I remember some classic moments.. one where he apparently was on a boat in Phuket with some other partners and they were all discussing a problematic project.. "AHhhhh... Kah Ri Pap la.. just send him there.." Words of wisdom that I remember... I was sent to this project to fire fight.. 7000 defects/ SIRs in total. Cheemology.

There was also this other time where I was sitting in the Singapore office, and this Singapore partner comes up to me and says "Are you Kah Ri Pap ah... eh.. this CYC says you're good, man... Come, pack your bags, you're going to Melbourne.." (That time, I had the cheek to answer "but I only have one spare underwear in my bag...")

Ah.. this partner has invited me to his house to eat "tu kar" (pork legs) and "poh piah"... the memories...

But I guess somehow it is the memories of me working in that firm for 13 years that evoked quite a bit of nostalgia and memories.. which make me wonder if I should ponder my mercernary status...

To this retiring partner, I say Thank You for the memories.

Tiles

2007-05-22T01:23:00.000+08:00

This afternoon, I did some tile shopping. I was at the Sea Park area and I checked out Niro Granite and Guocera.

Wah, shopping for tiles is also one kinda of an experience... there are different kinds of tiles. Polised. Matt. The sizes also differ.. the finishing... the polish.. ceramic... homogenous... mosaic... stripped inserts..

Cheem...

I tell you, I spent the whole afternoon selecting tiles.. what I can share is the Niro tiles have nice homogenous tiles for the floor (why homogenous, one might ask? Homogeneous tiles mean the whole tile is of the same material.. some porceline or ceramic tiles only have the top layer made of ceramic but if that top surface chips off, you can see a different colored tile underneath). Guocera has nice designer tiles for the kitchen and the wall.

This is what I chose for my floor tiles
http://www.nirogranite.com.my/HTML/Catalog/regal.htm
http://www.nirogranite.com.my/HTML/Catalog/Ivory.htm

For my bathroom tiles, check these out in Guocera's website
http://www.guocera.com

Ponds!

2007-05-22T01:19:00.000+08:00

Last weekend I decided to go pond shopping. Now, how many of you have gone out and "bought" a koi pond? How much do you think a 10 feet by 6 feet pond will cost?

I thought 2-3K. Wah lao, my testicles nearly popped out of their sockets when I got a quote of 10-14K. And I shopped around.. it is indeed that amount! Ya, I got a 8-9K quote but the guy was honest, he said there are "contractor materials" (means crap) and there are "materials we sell to customers" (means good stuff).. so that's why there is the difference.

My god.. more than 10K just for a pond? Why? All just to have a water feature.. sigh.. this pond better rake in more money in the long term for me man...

The guy tells me a lot of things go into making a pond
- must dig lobang
- must treat the lobang (mmm mmm)
- must put some base/ fibre glass thingy
- put concealed pump and filter
- etc etc...

Jialat man!

I'm learning more and more just by renovating my place!

New School

2007-05-18T20:47:00.000+08:00

Today was a day for fun and sadness for my son.

Firstly, he had his school sports day. Now, my son goes to school in the afternoon and he normally wakes up at 830am.. but today, he was so fired up for his sports day that we just shoke him a bit he shot out of bed at 630am, ready for the world!

The sports day was fun for him.

After the sports day, we drove him to his new school. Now, most of you know that I'm moving to my new place in Desa ParkCity.. so there's a school very near to Desa ParkCity.. (like 2 mins away) so obviously it makes sense to send my son to this school. But we knew that he'd fight tooth and nail not to go to this new school.. so today, after his sports day, we nicely drove him to his new school...

He innocently asked "eh.. what's this school ah?"

Then we told him.

Wah lao.. my son's tears all came pouring out... I was so sad for him... I know that moving to a new school can be difficult, new friends, missing old friends.. so my son was so emotionally taken aback that he kept silent the whole trip where we brought him around his new school...

I had to do something drastic...

I went over to Cineleisure and bought 4 tickets for SpiderMan 3 with my Titanium Card (buy 1, get 1 free!)...

Adsense

2007-05-17T14:50:00.000+08:00

Notice that I've turned on Google Adsense?

I was inspired over the weekend when I read the NST article abt this Malay dude, 20+, all he does is blog and he turns on google adsense and his 4 figure USD comes in. I'm like wah lao eh.. like that oso can ah.. i must also try man...

But I guess for this to happen I have to advertise my blog to the world.. something I'd probably not wanna do.. you know lah, my humour quite cynical and "one kind" one... you think some dude from the US of A reading my Manglish can unnerstand one ah?

I may have to go commercial and blog abt handphones!

Survivor

2007-05-16T02:30:00.000+08:00

I just finished watching the latest Survivor Fiji. I must say that this has been a very disturbing episode.

For those of you who don't follow... there's this 54 year old Chinese dude in the game. Computer Engineer. Damn smart. Frail Looking. But he found the immunity idol. And when it was down to 6, this Chinese dude, Yau Man, won the reward challenge. That got him a kick ass USD60K truck. This guy decided to make a trade with this loud mouth black cheerleader coach called Dreamz. The deal? If both Yau Man and Dreamz are in the final 4, if Dreamz wins immunity, he would give it to Yau Man.

And guess what?

In the final 4, Dreamz wins. And at tribal council, the f*cker decides not to honour his word and Yau Man gets voted out!

Wah lan.

I'm like how stupid man. Firstly, if you do shit like that, even if Dreamz gets into the final, the jury will look at him like a lying sonafa bitch! And when Dreamz goes out into the workforce, everyone will never ever trust him.

On the other hand, lets say Dreamz did give the immunity to Yau Man. Worst case is Dreamz gets voted off.. but he joins the jury with his integrity intact, and when he steps out to the work force, everyone will remember him as someone they can trust.

Wow.. I've never blogged abt a reality show before, but I must say my heart went out to the Chinese dude. He played well, and he should have been the ultimate survivor.. but he got crapped on by a lying stinker...

Renovation Starts!

2007-05-16T00:37:00.000+08:00

I started my renovations last week.

I asked my feng shui master, eh.. what date to start ah.. basket, out of the blue he tells me on Friday that I had to start on Wed! Wah lan.. and that Monday I was flying off to Korea.

So that previous weekend I scrambled like eggs lah. Wah lan.. got specific time to start one... my contractor oso quite feng shui savvy. He even ask "got any specific animal pantang step into your house or not during renovation start?"

Cheem!

What not to do with your passwords...

2007-05-06T13:47:00.000+08:00

You know the old joke.. people sticking their passwords and IDs on the screens.. Here I am in Hong Kong, major office relocation, applications moving to different data centres.. and I'm sitting on the table of an actuary, and she has this sticking to her telephone...

HomeDec 07

2007-05-02T05:48:00.000+08:00

I was at HomeDec 07 in the KL Convention Centre. I tell you, this was a 4 day convention which I went for 3 consequtive days! Was it good? It was great!

Lemme tell you..I was scouting flooring.. gatal... wanna see if it makes sense to replace my upstairs flooring... After scouting around, I found this solid wood Burmese teak flooring going for RM6.90 a square feet. Now, I compared this with Engineered Wood (which is 3 layers, with the bottom layer being plywood) at RM5.50 a square foot, and Laminated Wood which ranges from RM4+ to RM8+ per square foot (and laminated wood is thinner than solid wood). Amazing.

Then there were also great deals on kitchen hobs, hoods and ovens. I got this deal for RM1.5K less than Harvey Norman!

LCD TVs and Home theatres were also abt RM1K less than normal prices...

I got good deals on sliding wardrobes (come and talk to me.. I now know all the technical details abt anti jump mechanisms!)

After 3 days, I think I have learnt quite a lot abt furnishing a house!

Curtains!

2007-04-26T17:19:00.000+08:00

And I thought the kitchen cabinets were tough!

Curtains is another nightmare man.. now, do you think it is cheap to furnish the whole 3 storey house with curtains?

Firstly, you have to ask yourself.. do you want your curtains to look like the pieces of cloth you get at Kamdar or Globe Silk Store? If you do, then that is C H E A P. But it makes your house look like a prostitute den.

But if you want your house to look like those pictures in the interior design magazines (who doesn't), then you got to go to some curtain specialist like Baagus or SSF Curtains. KNN man, the sheer curtains there are damn nice but damn expensive. Some of the damn nice ones are like RM169 per square foot! So for fun, I sat down and did an estimate with Baagus, wah lao, my front door already, with the 3 panel sliding door, sheer day curtains and nice night curtains.. RM2400 for the entire 3 panel sliding door!

Then I calculated, for my whole house, and assuming some of the Roman Blinds I can buy the buy 1 get one free, and assuming I get a 25% discount on the custom made curtains.. RM10K for the whole house man!

I went to Macy to get the same quote.. cheaper.. but also quite teruk... RM7K.

Wah.. no joke man.

Kitchen!

2007-04-25T22:54:00.000+08:00

The last few weeks I have been going around looking at options for kitchen cabinets.

I've seen them all! Signature Kitchen, Bofi, Lifestyle Kitchen, Rowenta, Kian Classics, EBAC, AINO.. all I tengok already.

Wah I tell you, there are so many permutations in selecting kitchen cabinets.

Firstly, there's the type of material to make your cabinets. Wood? Veneer? MDF? (I dono WTF it stands for), Acrylic? Chipboard? All got pros and cons.

Then there's the colors.

Then there's also the kitchen top! Local or Imported Top? With or without backsplash? Solid top or granite or marble or just hantam?

Then there are the optionals like
- Blum? (soft closing drawers)
- special side drawers
- special drawers for under the sink

Can go crazy man...

Renovations

2007-04-21T02:02:00.000+08:00

Lately, besides work, I've also been very busy with my new house.

Yes, got the keys a while back.

I tell you, managing a new house is no joke. As you guys know, I got this feng shui fella to come in to scan the house a month ago. Thank god he basically said my place didn't have major flaws for me as the occupant so my renovations are quite minor. But got lah, some here and there, like move this door, close up this thing etc etc.

Engaging the feng shui fella is also one story.

Then after that, it is the next stage of employing an Interior Designer.

Wah lao, you say, so cheem one ah?

Of course la.. I figured I spent so much money buying that house I might as well spend some more lor and do it up nicely. If it was left to me, sure rojak and koyak rabak one.

Selecting an Interior Designer is also like vendor selection man. I got 2 ID fellas to come in and give me ideas and quotations. At the end of the day, the quotations all very different ballpark figures. They firstly charge for their design fee which is in between RM4K to RM8K... depending on how big your house is. But I think what was important was whether the ID fella got good ideas or not.

I had this one guy, he will drive all the way from Balakong to see me even if I change the meeting at the last minute. I liked his "baruah-ness" but aiyoo.. his fee like cock and his ideas are like some TAR college student man. I settled with this other dude who did up my cousin's house in Bukit Damansara. This guy was cheaper, a bit more lan si, but he got some good ideas.

Then once you settle on the designer, he will start sketching out some drawings from a birds eye view to confirm placement of furniture etc. Wah lao, you have to even take photos and measurements of your old furniture that you want to move into the new place man. Some of the old furniture the fella even say don't bother bringing over. "Clash with the theme", he says. Cheem!

Then the kitchen is another story man. You can get the ID fella do draw. But ideally, he will recommend that you go to a kitchen specialist to get better equipment and ideas. Specialist mah, he says! Kanina.. I was like thinking I just go to one fella and one stop shop.. basket.. now I have to run around like a dog.

So I'm now in kitchen designer selection mode. No joke man.. kitchen cabinets and tops itself is like one world of itself. I have so far seen Signature Kitchen (not bad) and Rowenta Kitchen (like cock). Wanna scout around Aino Kitchen and Kian Classic...

After the kitchen, there's the garden to landscape!

Weary

2007-04-10T00:30:00.000+08:00

My god, has it been that long since I blogged?

Well, the end of March weekend was particularly long for me. I had to endure Friday, Saturday and Sunday with perhaps only 2 hours of sleep during those 3 days because of a crucial system cutover.

And by golly, I am no longer young. Once I got home, I slept and slept.. and when awake, I'm still tired! It has taken me almost a week before I can be at least "not so sleepy". Man, is it tiring!

And I have another cutover end April....

Ligers

2007-03-29T23:43:00.000+08:00

There is a new post at the bottom of this one. I'm just pinning this post to the top

There are photos for my son.. took them in HK.. he's such a Zoids fan.. its for him to see and choose which he likes.

Liger Zero Phoenix

Liger Zero Falcon

Energy Liger

Liger Zero X

Ultimate Vulgarity

2007-03-29T23:22:00.000+08:00

Someone told me that the MSN conversation posting I made a few weeks ago was so hilarious, I just had to post another one...

This guy I'm chatting with is like the COO of the HK business. He's a Malaysian too.

karipap said:
I wanna buy a Chinese/ English Translator
SkyLark said:
Fuck you la.. just go downstairs to the electronic shop and bring your dick
karipap said:
wah.. just bring my lan chow can oready ah?
karipap said:
no need credit card?
SkyLark said:
then ask those sales ladies to suck on your balls
karipap said:
they will choke, man
SkyLark said:
pay any thing you wish then ask them to fuck off and give you that translator
karipap said:
eh.. i got to go
karipap said:
i tokok with u tomorrow
SkyLark said:
so near the hotel, just go
SkyLark said:
bye fcker
karipap said:
fuck you man

SkyLark says:
Datuk, what the hell is that email about?
karipap says:
which email?
karipap says:
the MORE?
karipap says:
u never pay attention on the privacy calls meh?
karipap says:

karipap says:
eh.. i got the fucking SSL waiver for you oready
SkyLark says:
no la, so manythings happened at once
SkyLark says:
ok thank la,
karipap says:
jangan tension
karipap says:
BUT
SkyLark says:
you know those fuckers are really bad, the NSM servers still cannot be connected
karipap says:
the waiver, I think I need someone to approve from the busienss
karipap says:
lemme read first
SkyLark says:
I can do this
karipap says:
lemme sort out your SSL first in the next 5 minutes
karipap says:
the NDM, i have no head or tail, maybe u have to fuck mike mazz for that
karipap says:
wait ah
karipap says:
ok
karipap says:
the ssl waiver
karipap says:
i need to... "send to an officer on the business side"
SkyLark says:
ok MJ now is working for the compliance thing,
karipap says:
who the fuck can do that?
karipap says:
you can?
SkyLark says:
i cannot
karipap says:
cibai
karipap says:
who then?
SkyLark says:
I have to be at Harbourfront from tomorrow till next Tuesday
karipap says:
Don't tell me Rory ah
karipap says:
if ROry, you better prep Rory
SkyLark says:
since I have to approve those cheques in the office
karipap says:
eh focus
karipap says:
we kow theem SSL first
karipap says:
Who is this "officer of the business"
karipap says:
who is someone who will ask few questions?
SkyLark says:
how the fuck should I know
karipap says:

karipap says:
cibai
SkyLark says:
I am not an officer, because I don't kiss assess
karipap says:
fuck you la
karipap says:
serious a bit la
SkyLark says:
ok
karipap says:
i wanna sort this out now
karipap says:
who?
karipap says:
Rory?
SkyLark says:
either me or Rory
karipap says:
so you can ah..
karipap says:
I will send to you
karipap says:
all you need to do is answer seriously in an email
SkyLark says:
May be Rory would be better, but then what is the fucking ranking they want
SkyLark says:
I am only a VP
SkyLark says:
ok ok,
karipap says:
i call susan now
SkyLark says:

karipap says:
if she say VP can, then u fucking accept it la
karipap says:
wait ah
karipap says:
fucking woman dowan to pick up fone
SkyLark says:
she is too busy
karipap says:
like you la
SkyLark says:
no i only wank
karipap says:
next time i dowan to shake hands with you man
SkyLark says:
i am clean, wash my hand after wanking
karipap says:
jialat
karipap says:
who is following up on your NDM shit?
karipap says:
mike mazz isit?
SkyLark says:
mike mass, please ask this asshole to wake up and follow it through
karipap says:
he is awake oready
karipap says:
but the fucker i dono doing what
karipap says:
he's like a taichi master
karipap says:
all talk, no cock
SkyLark says:

SkyLark says:
diu everything is fucked up
SkyLark says:
and then what we should do is to kill them all
karipap says:
sending the waiver form to you now
karipap says:
you don't reply and say fuck or anything ah
SkyLark says:
fuck man what the hell are you doing ? the Business contact is Rory, la
karipap says:
i ask you, u say can?
karipap says:
cibai
karipap says:
never mind, you just reply and say that as a VP, you are ok with it
SkyLark says:
i can that's ok from now till the end of May, since I will be CPO
karipap says:
ya la
karipap says:
susan won't know
karipap says:

karipap says:
eh.. this NDM shit, what's the issue?
SkyLark says:
fuck man please let her know that I am black and long
SkyLark says:
cannot connect, then we cannot do the CIti's UAT
SkyLark says:
so what is the fucking matter with those people
SkyLark says:
how's is the regression test?
SkyLark says:
like shit i believe
karipap says:
ah..
karipap says:
not so bad la
karipap says:
the teruk shit yesterday
karipap says:
today less shit
SkyLark says:
so still fucking problem?
SkyLark says:
i think Clara is going to die
karipap says:
i think got one minor one
SkyLark says:
man she is so messy, she cannot figure out what fucking version she put up there at Fujitsu, and then wanted to have sex with the machine
karipap says:
eh.
karipap says:
tomorrow u're in harbourfront?
karipap says:
ginny wants me to send the compliance spreadsheet over to Rory
karipap says:
so I need you to have a word with rory on that tomorrow
SkyLark says:
ok
karipap says:
just tell him that we got things covered, and we are good from a legal and privacy stdpoint
SkyLark says:
i will ask Rory to call you Datuk
karipap says:
and tell him to acknowledge the spreadsheet
karipap says:
i will ask rory to call you Tan Sri
SkyLark says:
fuck man it takes me like 2 days to understand what the hell is going on and now
karipap says:
understand what?
SkyLark says:
you ask me to explain it to him, like 10 days?
karipap says:
no need to explain la
karipap says:
aiya.. if so kang khor... u want me to go over to Harbourside to explain?
SkyLark says:
he is a detailed CEO
SkyLark says:
so he will either fuck me / fuck U so please clean your ass before coming to Harbourfront
karipap says:
so how, u want me to go over there?
SkyLark says:
le tme think, i will so the explination, since I have to take care of the money authorzation tomorrow, as our CFO is not in town
karipap says:
u lemme know la
karipap says:
but i will have to send the email in the morning
karipap says:
if not, ginny will complain i never let the CEO enuff time to digest
SkyLark says:
ok and don't send it now, i will fuck you up
karipap says:
tomorrow morning lah, you chibai
karipap says:
are u gonna approve the SSL waiver?
SkyLark says:
diu man, you are filling up my email box and then i cannot get those dirty pictures from my friends
karipap says:
kanina
SkyLark says:
how?
karipap says:
share some with me la
karipap says:
but don't send to company email
karipap says:

karipap says:
kanina.. u know there was someone who got sacked because he view porno

karipap says:
cibai
SkyLark says:
in Company HK
karipap says:
i am on the VPN la
karipap says:
don't send this shit to me
karipap says:
got monitoring software one

You have failed to receive file "untitled 11.bmp" from SkyLark.

SkyLark says:
done?
SkyLark says:
fuck you why scare?
karipap says:
i not so rich like you
SkyLark says:
you are scare shit
karipap says:
i cannot aford to get sacked
SkyLark says:
no i am not rich, i am inch
karipap says:
i am "foot"
SkyLark says:
I have already send 10 pics to your email account
SkyLark says:
please replicate
karipap says:
never receive
karipap says:
i bet u kena filter my company firewall
SkyLark says:
so you are fucked now
karipap says:
tomorrow i will get some fucking warning, you fucker you
karipap says:
eh, go approve the ssl waiver la
SkyLark says:
but to your gmail s
karipap says:
ah
karipap says:
gmail ah
karipap says:
then can
karipap says:

SkyLark says:
where the hell is the SSL approval email?
SkyLark says:
can you resend?
karipap says:
u never receive?
SkyLark says:
nope,
SkyLark says:
from whom?
karipap says:
hmm
karipap says:
ok
karipap says:
i resend
SkyLark says:
fuck where the hell is the mail?
karipap says:
sending la
SkyLark says:
ok be quick please do that and don't fucking wank on those pictures
karipap says:
your pictures not dirty enuff
SkyLark says:
beauty not dirty
SkyLark says:
you have no taste
karipap says:
haha
SkyLark says:
done asshole
SkyLark says:
just approved
karipap says:
thanks fucker
SkyLark says:
some mother fucker is going to know that I am a VP
SkyLark says:
very poor person

Blow Job

2007-03-22T23:59:00.000+08:00

Here I am, waiting for the conversion programs to run... and wasting time surfing You Tube. I came across this great video! Priceless!

Back in HK

2007-03-22T19:03:00.000+08:00

I am now back in HK. We have a mock conversion starting today for a system going live next week.. so it is damn tense.

On the train from the airport, I spotted this convention.. must visit...

Discount!

2007-03-22T18:59:00.000+08:00

I was in Tesco the other day and I saw this sign! Isn't it so lame that they're advertising a 1 cent discount?!?

Home

2007-03-14T21:01:00.000+08:00

Sorry to all.. a lot of you folks have been pinging me, sending me emails on why I have not updated my blog in a long time.. Well, firstly, I wanted to leave the Malacca blog more towards the top! haha... but seriously, I have been busy with my new house.

Yes.. I bought a new house a couple of years ago at Desa Park City. http://www.desaparkcity.com. Cost me a bomb. And my arse hurts prostituting myself off just to pay for the house. Here's an article in the edge abt how expensive the houses are there. (PS: I didn't buy Zenia.. I kena prostitute front side and backside to afford it). http://www.theedgedaily.com/cms/content.jsp?id=com.tms.cms.article.Article_7c6678ba-cb73c03a-cef6f100-899fd6ea

Anyway, got my keys 2 weeks ago. And I desperately wanna move in!

So immediately got a feng shui fella to come over and "scan the place". This guy is one of the Malaysia famous fellas (and it is NOT Lillian Too... I don't trust her theories that just putting some brass object can suddenly cure affliction.. too mumbo jumbo)...

I'm not working with an Interior Designer.. asking for ideas.. so lets see la what happens ...

Bribe!

2007-03-02T06:34:00.000+08:00

My son... he takes the bus to school.. and you know la, the bus sometimes gets rowdy, sometimes there's pushing and shoving etc etc.. One day he comes back with a scratch under his eye and he claimed that "his friend" used his wallet to lash out at him.

Of course I was furious. Complained so much to the driver that the child's parent called me for an apology.

Then yesterday, same shit happens. That boy scratched my son's arm and it bled a little. The boy panicked because I am sure his mother whacked the shit out of him after I complained the last time So this boy, his name was Ethan, told my son..

Ethan: "ayo! sorry la! don't tell your mother..."

KariJnr: "cannot!"

Ethan: "ayo! err.. you take this one ringgit lah" (!)

KariJnr: "Money will not make it better"

Ethan: "ayo! How abt ten cents instead?" (!!)

Pissed

2007-02-26T23:27:00.000+08:00

You know, I've been working on this project in Hong Kong for a while. We're doing UAT now and there are heaps of problems. So this IT Lead fella, just before Chinese New Year, begged me to spend time in HK. I told him "this week I can go for 3 days only, then the week after, 1 week". He said "I will take what I can get"

Then today the joker tells me "I dono if I can justify you flying there for 3 days only". I'm like WTF man... 2 weeks ago you were begging me to go, and now this shit? I feel like I've been treated like shit.

And I fly economy! My flight is like USD350. Throw in hotel stay and I will clock max USD1K!

He himself flies himself out and spends 1 day or 2 in each country of his fancy and they clock USD20K!

CCB man.. tonite really no mood to support HK.

What not to name your product

2007-02-22T00:32:00.000+08:00

I saw this bag of chips in a supermarket...

Stress

2007-02-20T16:44:00.000+08:00

It's the Chinese New Year.. and I'm still working, man.. I got this system in HK that I wanna go live in April and I've been on calls every day to monitor testing, fixes (I even have to prioritise fixes, tai chi away change requests man!)

Sometimes when we're stressed, a lot of the communications between a few of us key folks become damn vulgar. Observe:

Mark says:
at least part of the news come at 4:00
Mark says:
all U/W reports are completely tested and ok
Mark says:
POS & Fins are on its way now,
Mark says:
the only thing now left is with interface files
karipap says:
how many UW reports?
Mark says:
fucking amazing
Mark says:
5
karipap says:
so 6 out of 18 is ok?
Mark says:
one of the POS report is cleared as well
karipap says:
7 out of 18!
Mark says:
and one more from B&C is cleared
Mark says:
fucking amazing
karipap says:
8 out of 18!
karipap says:
ya, how come last minute all ok
Mark says:
still testing
karipap says:
previously, for so many months, all not ok
Mark says:
I fucking kill EAB to do this faster and I pinch their assholes
Mark says:
by my own bare hands
karipap says:
then i better not shake your hands the next time i'm in HK...

Smart!

2007-02-14T01:38:00.000+08:00

My son passed up the homework that I did for him last night.. his teacher looked at him and said

"Cher ker ser sui ter handwriting?"

My son said "Ser wor la".

His teacher looked at him funny...

Exams!

2007-02-13T00:33:00.000+08:00

Last 2 weeks have been very stressful. My son, now in Standard 2, is having his exams! And of course I'm more stressed than him!

His exams started last week. He brought back a piece of paper with the time table. It said
- Thursday: Chinese
- Friday: BM
bla blah

Then on Thursday, he said "eh.. today BM exam". I'm like KNNECCB. Later he tells me "oh ya, teacher said the Chinese and BM the dates change.. " Damn! You see what I mean!

And my son's school.. Chinese school lah.. firstly.. his exams are BEFORE Chinese New Year.. The past 2 weekends, where got mood to go out and buy CNY clothes? All other Chinese schools the exams are AFTER new year!

Secondly, even tho got exam, still ada homework! Wah lao. Tomorrow, my son has BM Paper 2 and Chinese Paper 2 (ya man.. primary school oso got Paper 1 and 2). And he has 3 pieces of A4 homework to do! Wah lao.. if don't pass up, oso will kena punishment! I think I will do the homework for him....

Naik Harga

2007-02-06T02:46:00.000+08:00

It's that time of the year, where we are spiralling towards Chinese New Year. Now, why is Malaysia the only place where as you get closer, price of hair cuts and food suddenly increase?

I mean food maybe.. but hair cut? How come? No real reason!

See this special tiered pricing at my local hairdresser! Every few days naik RM1!

Kwai Low Problems

2007-01-31T08:12:00.000+08:00

I have to deal with a lot of useless kwailou's in my current company. They are all the same.. all wanna tokok, during conference calls they will talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk and talk. But they don't do any work....

SO what pissed me off is we are doing this major core system replacement. These kwai lou's all never read the func specs one. I lah, the IT fella, who is the one who ends up reading.

Then in the status call yesterday, the kwailou's boss said

"I expect you, JewSerFine and you, Tom to read each and every func specs and when I ask you, I expect you to be able to explain it to me"

The blardy charbor said "yup".

KNNECCB! I laughed until I crapped man! Kanina, these kwailou's always want to look good in front of their bosses!

Beer Girls

2007-01-30T01:28:00.000+08:00

I was at a "steam boat" place in Hong Kong today and I noticed that there was a sexy beer girl pouring beer. It made me wonder.. we have the same shit in Malaysia and Singapore too.. why ah? Isn't this a great example of "cross selling" and "marketing"? I'm like.. if you are in a small town, actually the beer girls are quite ugly ah mahs.. but yet.. it still works! Why ah?

More Pix from HK

2007-01-28T23:56:00.000+08:00

More pictures with my Lumix. I spent my 2nd non working day in Hong Kong and I took the opportunity to go up to the Peak and to Lantau Island where the largest outdoor Buddha was.

Taking the tram up to the Peak.

Great scenery from the top of the Peak.

Thereafter, I went to Lantau Island to view the largest outdoor Buddha in all its majesty.

I also took a shot of the Buddha in the horizon on the ride there on the cable car.

Test Driving the Panasonic Lumix DMC-TZ1

2007-01-27T23:04:00.000+08:00

I just got my hands on the Panasonic Lumix DMC-TZ1. Ordered it off amazon.com for USD212. Great bargain. 10X Optical Zoom. 5 mega pixel.

Here are some shots from Hong Kong:

The above is a shot outside the famous Wong Tai Sin temple.

Look at the amount of folks praying and the amount of josstick!

Here is a vibrant picture in a lane selling prayer materials! All red!

I tested out the 10X zoom at Hong Kong's trams!

The Lumix also had a pre-set "Food" mode! Here's a short at a restaurant (Yuen Kee) with its signature prawn with crab roe.

Finally, let's try out the Lumix's night shot mode.

Sweet

2007-01-17T00:29:00.000+08:00

My son and the girl he sits next to.

School Report!

2007-01-16T00:30:00.000+08:00

My son, the Standard 2 kid... I do have some interesting stories about him nowadays.

He used to get so much homework during his standard 1 that nowadays, when he comes back without homework, I get panicky!

"eh, u pay attention in class or not?" is my normal question. Just feels a bit odd with the reduced amount of homework nowadays... maybe its because it is just week 3 of school. We shall see.

My son's class teacher has an interesting concept, rotating the children around every week to sit with different children. So one week this kid, another week another kid. So far, my son has always been paired to sit with a girl.

It's so cute to see how much he has grown up. Last year, he would go "urrk" and "yeak" when paired with a girl. Nowadays he has the cheek to come back and tell me that "that Rachel ah, quite pretty". Basket! Concentrate lah!

So today when I picked him up from school, Rachel came up to me and said "Uncle ah, this karipap junior ah... was a very good boy today, he didn't disturb me at all". Wah! I was so happy! Because, if you know my son, he's the No. 1 champion in talking and disturbing people!

Then on the ride back, my son could even tell me that "Yap Wei Lin today told me that I am her boy friend. I told her to get away from me!"

Ha.. it's these simple conversations with your kids that sometimes puts a nice smile on your face.

Damn Funny

2007-01-13T01:48:00.000+08:00

It's one of those weeks.. damn busy like f*ck.. some more got so many con calls.. tired man...

One of my friends sent me this website link he stumbled on: http://www.sggirls.com.

Some of the forum topics there are classic! Check this out

http://www.sggirls.com/?action=thread_display&thread_id=192673

Now the topic is "How to know girl is..."

One guys says "HI... How to know girl is horny or not... I want to know is my girl friend is a horny girl or not... but i dunno how... Can anyone teach me how ?"

The reply? "see got horns on the head or not lor"

Another reply: "see below got wet anot"

Then there's another topic "Short Skirt Problem: Dare to wear Dare to show"

A guys starts off saying "girls always wear short skirt and always like so scared pple look at and under it.. i mean the point is that if they dare to wear that short.they gotta accept that people will look at it and without being pissed or something.. "

The replies?

"Genius leh you"

"hello fren, wake up la...
girls r like that de...
if they make police report, u will end up in jail, man"

Man! This website cracks me up!

Con Call complaint

2007-01-08T15:58:00.000+08:00

I spend a LOT of time on the phone.. you just won't believe it.. conference calls lah, one on one calls lah you name it...

One of the things i really beh tahan is that because the company I work with is such a conference call centric company, there are a lot of folks who now have managed to develop an art of "feeling busy" on con calls.

There are some calls that are damn boring... so u just wanna sign on, announce your name, then continue playing Need for Speed: Carbon or watch Amazing Race Asia.

On some of these calls, there is another trick where you sign on, then you cepat cepat announce "by the way, I have a call in 30 mins so can I give my update first?". BTW, this happens on the weekly staff call.

Then there's the bloody irritating character who, everytime he speaks, must say "hi this is XXXX". I'm like flip! We know la! Why must always announce your name one? You think we dono ah?

Then there's this other character, he starts the meeting, then he keeps quiet, then at the end of the meeting, he summarizes. HAHAHAHA... most of the time, it's the consultants who do this!

EPF

2007-01-08T15:57:00.000+08:00

last week I was over at KWSP/ EPF in Jalan Raja Laut. I must say I was quite impressed with the self service kiosks they had.. that allowed u to print your statement, sign up for an internet account etc. In fact, ever since my ex-company started doing some work for EPF, I felt the service has improved and EPF has been more innovative. Kudos!

Scum

2007-01-05T00:00:00.000+08:00

During my last trip to the US, my wife decided to send my maid away. Yes, another one bites the dust. You're probably wondering.. can anyone be so unlucky? Yes!

Anyway, my maid of 6 months was probably the cutest and sweetest maid you've probably seen (and I don't mean it in a sexual way, dammit!). Whenever it was time for me to go and pick up my son from school, she'd say "bye bye Sir!". Whenever we came back, she'd be the first to open the doors and greet us.

Little did we know that she's one scheeming bitch!

That bitch, one day when I was away in the US, my wife was wondering where the f*ck she was and found her squating in the backyard. No.. she was not taking a crap. She had this Nokia handphone in her hands (not a dildo, mind you, after all that FHM posting...). Kanina.. my wife blew her top man! Where the f*ck did she get that mobile from? Apparently she asked it from another neighbour's maid! Wah lao eh.. what's the world becoming.

Then we discovered that this maid of mine, damn freaking smart. She already worked out our timetable and schedule, and she knew when was the time we went out to pick up my son from school, that's when she'd SMS her husband and her husband would call on our home phone! And no wonder whenever our car pulls up to the driveway, straight away she greets us! She's on the lookout lah! Nahia!

Anyway, want to write abt her, can write a whole book, man... so immediately my wife sent her back!

Me? Immediately I went "oh shit, it's back to the cleaning, sweeping, mopping, laundry etc etc".

So I ordered a Roomba from Amazon!

Nice little baby!

When I first tried it out, I found that you really needed to clear as many things away from the room (like if you had any small shelves, or movable trolleys etc) to create as wide a space as possible.. then the Roomba would nicely go around and vacuum your room.

Some rooms were trial and error in terms of how to move stuff around so that the roomba can figure out how best to optimally clean the room.

Initially, my wife scooffed at it! "Wah lao, 1 hour to vacuum a room ah? I can sweep the room in 5 minutes!" Of course lah... how to compare? But nowadays, my wife agrees that the Roomba has freed us a little from some of the mundane tasks.

Here are some pictures of the roomba.

Here it is in its full glory!

These are the removable parts that can be cleaned and washed.

Here's the roomba charging! Have to buy a portable transformer since it's a US device.

Year 2

2007-01-03T23:44:00.000+08:00

Today, my son, the cartoon fella, began Standard 2!

When I was driving him to school, he was telling me that he was a little nervous, but once he got to school and met his friends, he was his usual bouncy self!

My son's class now has moved from the ground floor to the 3rd floor. Now you know Chinese school lah, the school books all berlambak. In fact, my son has actually developed some pectorals since the Standard 1. Now that he's on the higher floor, there's no way he can use the normal trolley bag (weighs a ton with the wheels). So I actually invested RM269 for an ergonomically correct bag that apparently disperses the weight! I saw that a lot of other parents did the same!

Getting to school was a nightmare today. My son's school now has 14 Standard 1 classes! It's because this year's Std 1 batch are all born in the year of the Dragon, so u can imagine lah! (Year 2000).

Here he is at his new class!

FHM

2007-01-03T00:42:00.000+08:00

Today was a bizarre day.

A few days ago, my brother in law came with a stack of magazines. His house mate works for Times Publishing, and hence he gets loads of free mags, like Female, Cosmo, Lime and.... FHM.

Now, that pile of mags sat on my coffee table, and after lunch, my wife, went and picked up one mag to browse. She picked up FHM.

Kanina... immediately after that, she complained about the mag!

"Wah, what kind of magazine is this? All the women scantily dressed (yum)"

"All the women pose like that one (and she arches her body in such a way that enhances the frontal portion of one's chest)"

"And the articles so koyak one.. can you imagine this interview? What would you like to bring along to a desert island. A vibrator! And what else? You know what the girl answered? Batteries! Ayo!"

Now, that converation I felt was damn funny but later, my wife started giving me the weird look (not the "i want sex" look.. the "you're in deep shit" look).

Wah lan.. she whack me and ask "eh.. you know this magazine ah?"

Of course I said yes! FHM mah! Which guy doesn't know?

Wrong answer man! I should have said no!

My wife then said "wah lao, how come you know this kind of magazine ah? Because of the sexy babes ah? If I ask you about religious magazines, you know or not?"

Now firstly, I thought, where does it exist such a "religious magazine"?

Secondly, I was .. WTF? From no where kena whack?

Damn puzzling man.... so in short, I conclude... for married men, please... don't let any FHM or girlie magazine into your household! Doesn't bode well!

Friend's wedding

2007-01-01T14:58:00.000+08:00

on Dec 30, I attended and old friend's (let's call him F) wedding... he used to be my good old classmate back in Malacca from Standard 1 till Form 5. He used to be a goody two shoes fella, very "kuai chai" person whom I treated like my "best friend" during my early schooling days. We did everything together! Cycle to town together! Catch guppies in the longkang together! Throw stones at dogs together! Everything lah! (except wear each others' underwear).

After Form 5, we both drifted apart. I went to Australia to study. He went to the US. The funny thing was, I was voted "more likely to go wild" but I ended up toeing the line. My goodie two shoes friend ended up with a snazzy haircut ala 50 cent and he terrorised the dance floors after weekends of clubbing action.

During his wedding dinner, I sat next to another of my old alma matter friends. This other friend was an utter arse hole during school days. He wasn't such an arse hole now... showing us that time does mellow us oldies.

There were a few funny occassions during the course of the dinner.

Firstly, my "ex- arsehole" friend sitting next to me asked "I wonder what F has done with his porno collection..."

This friend also gave me the inside scoop of how F, same age as I am, was desperate to "find charbor" that he started attending Church Camps to, in his own words, "find a wife". Now, I for one, never really thought that all these Church camps were truly "church camps". They all felt like some heavily disguised "Temptation Island" (remember that reality show?... http://www.temptationonfox.com )

Then the MC decided to play a game. This was when he got the bride and groom (F) up the stage and he played this "how well do you know your spouse game". Now this was when he asked a question to the bride, and he posed the same question to the groom and vice versa. Now, first thing on my mind was "bloody dangerous ain't it"? :) What if both the bride and groom all salah and end up quarelling?

Anyway, one of the questions to the bride was "Does F brush his teeth every night". Straight away my "ex-arsehole" friend said "no lah! Sometimes he doesn't even shower!"

Of course, F wanted to "save face" and answered "Yes". The bride was smarter. She answered No... so when the emcee revealed F's answer, both me and my friend (we were strategically seated right at the back row) both shouted "He Lies!"

Anyway, during that dinner, I also bumped into a few other ex class mates. We spent a good deal of time catching up, so I guess this wedding dinner was great. Somehow, the way things pan out, you always drift apart from your good friends from the Standard 1 to Form 5 era. Then when you go to the uni, you make another set of friends, who yet again, you drift apart when you begin work. All my best friends now are work mates, but sometimes it does feel strange how time has pulled apart the best of friends, when turning back the clock, it seemed unthinkable that we would be torn apart.

Anyway, best of luck in your new found status, F! Congratulations on your wedding!

Happy New Year!

2007-01-01T14:55:00.000+08:00

I'd like to wish everyone a Happy New Year! May Year 2007 bring much more happiness, wealth and progression to all!

For me, 2006 was a topsy turvy year. It's a year where I finally got into stride understanding how to work in a highly political user environment. I got to know who to suck up to, who I can piss off without much detriment... and at the same time, I also end up questioning what I'm doing here... haha... why? That's another blog man!

Zoids!

2006-12-29T12:18:00.000+08:00

My son has a new passion! It's no longer Transformers! When he was down in Singapore, he caught fancy of these huge robotic ancient creatures like dinosaurs and sabre tooth tigers!

http://www.hasbro.com/zoids/

This is what I spent most money on! PS: I had to build these creatures from scratch!

Chuppa Chups!

2006-12-27T16:01:00.000+08:00

Remember this lollipop?

I was watching Astro on the kids channel the other day and they had this advertisement with the tag line "It's nice to suck"

Err... a bit pornographic ain't it?

http://www.chupachupsgroup.com/

If u go to their website, they even have a reference to "Benefits of sucking".

Yeah yeah... i know.. it's my brain....

Earthquake

2006-12-27T15:28:00.000+08:00

Today there was an earthquake in Taiwan knocking out internet connectivity from Asia to the US. So I was affected. But after 8 hours, we got some intermittent connectivity. That was when I saw this email from this "CIO of Asia".. he sent out an email to Hong Kong (which got knocked out) asking "hey guys, did u lose internet connectivity?"

I'm like DUH!

CIO of Asia!

Like as if they (HK) can receive his email! Even if they receive, fat chance of them responding!

Sometimes I wonder how these people get into such positions...

Arse!

2006-12-27T02:14:00.000+08:00

I saw this funny pen holder whilst hanging out in Singapore. Hilarious!

Singapore!

2006-12-27T00:22:00.000+08:00

Over the past week, I was down in Singapore again for my annual pilgrimage. It's more for my wife and kid.. they love window shopping down in Singapore.

One thing I noticed is that walking around, somehow the women there "looked nicer". What does that mean? In general, they dress nicer, somehow their tits look fuller or more protruding (my wife even said that!) and they somehow dress showing more cleavage.

Unfortunately, I don't have any pictures to show for it.. (how la.. you think it's easy to whip up one's mobile and snap someone's boobs ah? You try lah!)

I do have some decent pics here...

Firstly, I always liked this X'mas tree in Takashimaya.

In Bugis Junction, there's this jewelrer who tried to up the ante by creating an X'mas tree entirely out of diamonds!

Lastly, the scenes in Orchard Road were packed with people!

Calculation Error

2006-12-09T11:26:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, i got a call from yet another head hunter.

"Hallo! Karipap ah?"

"Ya?"

"You still working for this XXX ah? I got this one opportunity vely good one, want to try ah?"

"What's the job?"

"CIO. XXX Bank"

"Wow... ok.. give me details..."

"Well, Karipap, firstly ah.. I want to check ah, how much your current salary..."

"My current salary is in US dollars"

"Really ah.. so how much ah? This job XXX Ringgit"

"Err.. well I earn USD 1,000 (this is a fictitious number meant only for illustration)"

"Like that ah.. ringgit how much ah?"

"Wah lao eh.. multiply the exchange rate la"

"Like that ah.. how much ah?"

"Well, the exchange rate now is 3.7 or something"

"Like that ah.. how much ah?"

DOH!

A couple of NY pix

2006-12-09T01:02:00.000+08:00

Didn't have much time to do anything touristy.. but here's a couple of shots I took from my last trip.

This was a nice X'mas tree up in a park in NY.

This picture says it all! What a name!

Katak

2006-12-09T00:53:00.000+08:00

I'm back from a long US trip. Must be getting old.. i kept feeling sleepy at 4pm and waking up at 5am!

Anyway, it was a week long of conferences, meetings and meeting people.

Sometimes meeting the US folks are quite funny. These US folks are so "katak bawah tempurung" one..

Like for me, working in an International environment, we hit a lot of "regulatory" issues when we work on applications and the deployment of applications. For example, I'm working on the global rollout of a financial application and the company I work for has 2 regional data centres - one in Mexico, one in Singapore. Now the Singapore data centre has a DR site in Beijing. And who would anticipate that there are countries in Europe that disallow financial data being hosted in Beijing.

These are the real "globalisation" issues due to regulatory concerns.

And you know, we had a case study round table discussion on regulatory concerns... and the US fella kow peh lan and complains that his biggest regulatory concern is SOX (Sarbannes Oxley) because "SOX makes my developers document so much that it takes their time away from coding"

WTF!

Now you see what I mean by these US folks are so "narrow minded"?

US Trip

2006-12-03T13:54:00.000+08:00

I'm in the US right now. On the way, i was in transit in Vancouver and was caught in a snowstorm that delayed my flight for 3 hours! Take a look!

Son's birthday

2006-12-03T13:48:00.000+08:00

Blogging this a bit late... my son had his birthday party at Mc Donald's last weekend.. his real birthday is not until 2 weeks time but he wanted to do his party early (just one week after school ended) so he could invite his class mates.

This is his birthday cake

Biasa lah.. he's still gila Transformers!

Sex Sells

2006-11-23T05:57:00.000+08:00

Some of you (admit it, come on!) watch Amazing Race Asia. I must say that the 2 cute Philipino girls are probably the only reasons to watch. Apparently those 2 chics posed for FHM and Maxim before man! Check this out.. (scroll thru).

http://www.lawstude.blogspot.com

More bitching

2006-11-23T05:43:00.000+08:00

It's time for more bitching...

.. you know.. I have been at this user organisation for 13 months already (amazing.. i left my consulting job after 13 years.. and here I am bitching after 13 months)

Anyway, one of the things that pisses me off which is actually a similarity between the both places that I've been, is the fact that in order to progress, one needs to lick butt and talk crap and you don't really need to have a lost of substance.

There have been occassions where I have, on projects, made certain observations of certain things not going right, then some flipping joker who totally got no content but has a pair of good ears, will somehow whisper to some "upper management dude" on the state of matters and there you go, that joker somehow is seen to be more "keng chow". Totally CCB man.

Last week, I couldn't make it to Mexico. Wah lan... there was quite a number of functional specs documents (abt 100) distributed out.. KNN.. I was like the only joker reading all of them... even the functional ones... So I go into the meeting (via phone) and I was like tearing apart the func specs when suddenly the functional fella (quite powder ful lady).. suddenly she says "actually the documents are still work in progress... I'm like.. kanina.. if the documents work in progress, why distribute? And why are you defensive of the vendor? If the documents like cock, say la the documents like cock. Then in the status call with some even bigger upper management fella, this lady says "the workshop was a great success, everything went smooth..". Lam pah man.. I tell you, the func specs that came back... can you imagine, the reversal func specs document only half a page. Nahia.. how to do design? We're talking abt reversal man! There's no step by step on what events can be reversed, what happens when each business event is reversed etc... all these ppl just wanna look good.

It's like in the previous job I was in. I remember way back in the early 90s... I was a young ciku doing technical architecture work.. then this ang moh consultant came in from Los Angeles (wah.. cheem). Nahia, this fella just tokok only, here I am, working day and nite writing shell scripts that can take a design document and generate a shell of the program.. (yeah.. I was doing that steam stuff last time)... and this consultant just tokok, fix the Project Director's printer, and then he declare that wah.. the project save so much money because we now do recycling etc etc... Hallo! What's the priority here?

Anyway, enuff of bitching la... never ending

End of Standard 1

2006-11-17T20:52:00.000+08:00

Today is the last day of school for this year for my son. I must say that time has surely flown and when I look back at my son's struggles being an "ang moh" in a Chinese School, I am quite proud of his achievements.

When my son first went to school, he had almost zero knowledge of chinese. Well, he did go to kindy that had some chinese teachings, but nothing prepped my son for the amazing regimented teachings of a Chinese school.

- firstly, my son's school bag, wah lao eh... it was even heavier than a Kebangsaan school's Form 3 kid! I know because I compared! And the Chinese school fellas made it compulsory to bring the exercise books of all subjects every day! Jialat!
- tons of homework! My son arrives back from school between 7-730pm (afternoon school). After makan and a shower, he starts his homework the earliest also 830pm. Some times he goes on till about midnight! Yes.. it is that much!

- the standard! I've told you before in earlier posts abt how tough the exercises are. Like for spelling, I used to get "bola", "ball", "boy" in my Primary 1, my son gets full sentences mid way to his standard 1 (eg. "Look, there is a toy in the window" is kinda like the simplest sentence he got mid way.) And his maths... other schools get RM1 - RM0.20 = ?. He gets "RM1 - RM0.20 = X number of 20 cent coins?"

- crazed teachers! I never told you guys before.. he got this Bahasa Malaysia teacher who threatened my son with scissors before... because my son wasn't paying attention! She took the scissors, put it around his ears and said "since u were not listening, I might as well cut away your ears!"

I asked my son why he didn't run away.

He said his classmate who tried to run away, the teacher chased him and banged the boy against the blackboard like Batista doing a Power Bomb! Brutal!

Sigh.. he has indeed gone far. And I'm proud my son never complaints about his teachers. In fact, he still looks forward to school and the beatings.. which makes me love him even more.

I wish him all the best in Standard Two next year!

Home

2006-11-13T11:44:00.000+08:00

I'm still at home today. Was supposed to leave on a flight to Mexico on Sunday but my wife fell ill on Saturday so I cancelled my trip. Again.

Yes, for those of you familiar with me, I also have been wondering "how come my wife always somehow falls ill just before I travel". I know it's an evil thing to think about and it's not something I should even contemplate thinking about.. but the "strike rate" is just too uncanny...

Some of you know that my wife's health is not the greatest and these things happen, but today, she told me that everytime it gets close to the time I need to take off, she gets to anxious that her body sometimes just caves in.

I'm now wondering if I am not meant to travel and if this means I got to start looking elsewhere...

Apologies

2006-11-12T07:15:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, I do things that I'm not proud off. I have realised that I may, in the spur of the moment, say things or post things that reflect anger and I am not proud of it. Those of you who have read posts that think it is not the right thing, let me know. I will correct it. And apologies again for those who have read items that just don't seem right.